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Post by lingybear19 on Nov 15, 2009 22:36:47 GMT -5
We all know how the majority of Disney sequels blow, right? Well, here's a game where you can make up your own horrible ones for fun/shits and giggles. XP The more ridiculous, the better.
Example: Snow White 2: Evil Queen's Grandma's Cousin's Mother's Dad's Son's Friend's Uncle's REVENGE!
After hearing of the death of Evil Queen/Grimhilde, her Grandma's Cousin's Mother's Dad's Son's Friend's Uncle wants revenge! He is strangely just like Queen Grimhilde, and has a mirror, who makes cheesy cracks that don't make you laugh! The uncle hides most of the movie in mystery, Snow White enjoys her life in the castle and orders the Dwarfs around while the Prince is out on a mission! This movie reveals the side of Snow White you've never seen ... This movie is very (un)heart warming... <(/)3
Featuring the voices of that blonde from the view, Britney Spears, Miley Cyrus, and John Goodman as the Queen's Grandma's Cousin's Mother's Dad's Son's Friend's Uncle. All star cast people! So you will not want to miss this movie! <3
*plotline credit goes to Levs*
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Post by Quasimodo on Nov 16, 2009 12:28:49 GMT -5
The hunchback of Notre Dame III
Years have passed since Quasimodo and she-who-must-not-be-named married and the happy couple npw has an adorable daughter.
Well.. happy..? Maddie is now once again pregnant, and in her pregnancy nerves and temper she`s started reflecting somewhat differently over things.
The previously solitaire circus rabble, now with lots of acquaintances and even friends among the women of Paris has become very aware of, and envying of, her friends`handsome husbands, and is starting to grow bored with her own unsatisfying and boring relationship. A nobler woman she`s acquainted with introduces Maddie to a relative of hers, a quite handsome and stunning duke.
Despite having to be more and more alone with their daughter, Quasi suspects nothing, while his wife secretly starts spending more and more time with the duke.
Having a small bit of conscience left, (I`m shocked) Maddie is hesitant while the duke implies his wish for a more stable relationship.
However, as said nobleman plays on her old dream of becoming a famous and praised acrobat and offers her a position on a well respected circus her defenses fall all too much quicker than they should have.
Quasi happens to walk in on them when the duke proposes, and is nearly traumatized, not only to find another man hitting on his wife, but to hear said woman accept, unaware of her current husband`s presence.
It`s implied that you-know-who indeed marries her beloved duke and leaves Quasi behind, as the movie shows a heartbroken Quasi watching her leave Paris, and then does a little jump in time.
When we again meet the newly married, royal couple, they have a newborn son. Except for the fact Maddie can by no means pass him of as the duke`s child as the boy is a living image of his biological father. Needless to say Duke (Let`s just call him that from here on, shall we?)
is very unhappy with being bestowed such a misshapen little thing for his stepson and doesn`t treat him well.
The rest of the movie follows the poor boys search for an identity and ends finally with his arrival to Paris, where he becomes united with his father.
The movie, while having a miserable content, does actually have sort of an happy ending, Quasi and son is reunited, and it`s implied that they develops a deeper bond of friendship than a regular father and his son.
Considering the previous events of this movie, this reviewer dare say that these two hunchbacks probably are the only one true friend any of them will ever get.
Voice cast: Jonas brothers with friends, as well as the voice actors behind teletubbies
(This was kinda lenghty, i know, but the movie will be this long for the prupose of further pain to the reader\viewer)
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Post by seawitch on Nov 16, 2009 17:19:00 GMT -5
Beauty and the Beast II: Beauty is the BEAST
20 years have passed since Belle found love inside the broken shell of a monster and set him free from the spell which bound him, now as their 21st year anniversary draws near, jealous feelings are starting rear their ugly heads (three of them!) in the village below.
The Bimbettes, once three of the most beautiful and sought after women in France, have finally succumbed to witchcraft and now call them selves "The Sisters Mysterirux ". Believing they can avenge the death of their beloved Brute Gaston, whom fell to his death from the castle roof the night Belle released the Beast from his spell, the three of them have concocted a curse to turn Bell into a hideous Beast, placing a powerful spell on the castle and all whom live there. So one dark night, when the Prince leaves the castle on a mission to find Belles father Maurice who has mysteriously disappeared, the Sisters cast their spell.
Though trouble stirs inside the castle, all is not well outside its mighty walls either. After the Sisters spell to raise their dead lover did not quite go according to plan, Gaston the newly resurrected Zombie now thirsts for the blood of the one who killed him and is determined to hunt him down. Neither Belle nor Prince Adam is safe from the terrors of their past and when the film arrives at its final climax, which side will you choose?
With songs like Something there...in the dark, Can you feel the death, I just can't wait to be a Beast and Tale as old as Timex from Belton Jims, Alan Rickman and Miley Zimmer Beauty is the Beast is guaranteed to be hit for generations to come!
No substitutions, exchanges or ticket refunds.
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Post by lingybear19 on Nov 16, 2009 19:15:08 GMT -5
Mulan 3.5: Chien Po and the Magic of Christmas
Everybody seems to have forgotten the holiday spirit this year. =O Shang is being a heartless grump, Mulan has started a protest against egg nog because she accidentally drank some Ling spiked, Yao keeps claiming that there is no Santa Claus, Mushu is being greedy about everything (who'd have guessed?), and Chi Fu is evicting random people from their homes just...because...he feels like it! When the Emperor announces that Santa Claus is deathly ill and can't come to the kingdom for the annual Ho Ho Ho Ball, Chien Po disguises himself as Santa and plans to put everything right...or else Christmas will be doomed for all eternity!
Along with Ling disguised as an elf named Fred McTwinkletoes and Yao as Jared the Black Eyed Reindeer, the trio partake in wacky adventures to bring comfort and joy back to everybody. They go caroling, deliver presents, play with annoying children, string Christmas lights on random buildings even though electricity doesn't exist, and arrest a cheesy ripoff of the Grinch--only to let him free after he gives a corny speech about not being hugged as child and love this and eggnog that.
Towards the end, the Emperor awards them for their good deeds with cold chocolate (because hot is painful, he explains, he doesn't want nice peeps like them to burn their tongues) and he reveals that he is indeed Santa Claus, except on the Atkin's diet. He was just testing them. At this point, Mushu blurts out, "Do they EVEN celebrate Christmas in China?!"
The answer remains unsolved and everybody ends up lacing hands, singing MMMBop as the movie fades out with the song playing over the credits.
...WTF! XPPPPP
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Post by cale on Nov 16, 2009 19:59:44 GMT -5
Atlantis: Thatch-Man Begins
As Milo and Kida rule the City of Atlantis, trouble is brewing on the surface. A secret society, headed by the evil, malevolent, and incredulously religious Fro-Ho-Ho, is bent on seizing the ancient city and harnessing its crystal power. As Fro-Ho-Ho and his minions (who are hooded figures who sing in Latin) invade the city, Kida is killed. Sorry. Needed drama.
Interestingly, Milo is spared. Fro-Ho-Ho mistook him for nothing more than a nerd in cosplay, rather than the King of Atlantis. Out of his sorrow and wish for vengeance, a new man is born. No longer is he Milo Thatch. He is now, Thatch-Man, the White Nerd.
Fro-Ho-Ho now has the crystal, and has brought it to the surface world, where he plans to use it to wreak unspeakable havoc. Thatch-Man knows what he must do - go after the evil Judge, take back the crystal, and avenge his lover's death. All while wearing spandex. Arriving in Hot-ham City, he meets the mysterious bartender who goes by the name of Na-Bang. By the way she served him that chocolate milk with no straw, Thatch-Man knew he had a sidekick.
Armed and ready to defeat Fro-Ho-Ho and his Latin-singing minions, who are about to unleash the catastrophic and unspeakable powers of the crystal onto Hot-ham City, Thatch-Man and Na-Bang leap into action. With Thatch-Man's brains and Na-Bang's ... butt, Fro-Ho-Ho shall be defeated, Atlantis saved, and Kida avenged.
Or ... will it?
XDDD I'm nuts.
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Post by shetalkstodogs on Nov 23, 2009 17:29:14 GMT -5
Air-Buddies save Valentine's Day!
In this "thrilling" and "heartfelt" new Air-Buddies film, those little golden retrievers are at it again! Somehow they've gotten away from their parents again and wound up in Paris a week before the most romantic day of the year. But there is something very wrong with the scenery: no hearts or pink anywhere!
A heartbroken Rosebud then wanders into a young little limp girl named Sophie. Sophie is also sad that there is no sign of love in Paris, and that she has never seen any type of love or affection from her parents. Rosebud runs back to her fellow buddies and explains, then offers that they should save Valentine's Day. B-Dawg, through a long strand of weird white-guy-trying-to-be-black slang, agrees and convinces the others to go along.
Through a long string of hilarious circumstances, the buddies realize the true meaning of love and get Sophie an operation that miraculously restores her ability to walk. It is at this point that the buddies fall into a crate outside of a restaurant and get magically shipped back to their hometown in a matter of hours! Once home they tell their parents of the adventure in Paris, though Bud and his mate do not believe them and pass it off as being lost in the backyard for too long.
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Post by ~Elisa Maza~ on Nov 23, 2009 23:03:01 GMT -5
The sad thing is, I can see the Buddy movies doing something like that. *rolls eyes*
Snow White and the Seven Godfathers!
In this charming sequel, Snow White and her beloved prince return to the dwarf's cottage with some exciting news! Snow White is expecting a baby! The dwarfs are overjoyed, and they immediately throw a party!
But who will be godfather to the baby? Snow White wouldn't dream of being able to choose just one of her dear friends, so it's left to the fates in an exciting and hilarious competition! Friendships will be tested, but through love and understanding, the seven dwarfs will realize that they each have something wonderful to offer!
And, as a special surprise, just to shatter your precious childhood even more, you'll hear Dopey speak for the first time!
Featuring the incredible voice talents of:
Miley Cyrus as Snow White!
Robert Pattinson as Prince Fredinand!
Kevin Jonas as Doc!
Joe Jonas as Grumpy!
Nick Jonas as Happy!
Zac Efron as Sleepy!
Dylan Sprouse as Bashful!
Cole Sprouse as Sneezy!
and Justin Bieber as Dopey!
..................
It hurts just to joke about it.
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Post by milo on Dec 1, 2009 19:31:22 GMT -5
Stemmed from a crack cbox convo ....
Mulan: The Animated Series!
All of your favorite characters are back for fun-filled thirty-minute adventures! With laughs, brilliant new songs, and a heartwarming lesson, sure to delight the whole family! Catch season one, coming soon to Disney DVD and stunning HD Blu-Ray!
Ep. 1: Shang's Day Off - "What could possibly go wrong?"
Ep. 2: Yao Goes to Wal-Mart - "All this stuff, AND I saved money?!"
Ep. 3: Ling's Bad Romance - "I want your nasty, I want your disease ...."
Ep. 4: Mushu and the Evil WonTon - "This wonton called my mama fat!"
Ep. 5: Chien-Po and the Great Noodle Cook-Off - "How will I realize my dream and defeat the Noodle Master?"
Ep. 6: Mulan and the Feminists - "Shang, my new friends tell me that I shouldn't be taking your crap."
Ep. 7: Chi-Fu's Mother's Day Dilemma - "OH NO! The panda just destroyed my mother's day gift!"
Ep. 8: Cri-Kee and the Bugcatcher - *cricket sounds*
Ep. 9: Fa-Zhou and the Chicken who Wouldn't Behave - "War was easier than this chicken!"
XDD Lord, I had fun writing this. *Loves Mulan*
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Post by lingybear19 on Dec 1, 2009 20:00:43 GMT -5
ROFLMFAO!!!!!!
I LOVE YOU, MILO! XPPPPPPP *DIES*
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Post by bambi on Dec 2, 2009 23:42:28 GMT -5
Dumbo 2: The Search for Dumbo's Father
We never get to see who Dumbo's father was in the original movie. In this sequel, Dumbo yearns to know what happened to his father and he goes out to search for him. Along the way, he makes a few new animal friends and meets up with the black crows again, and they all sing several stupid musical numbers until Dumbo soon learns that his father was long dead before Dumbo was brought to his mother by stork, so Dumbo went on this journey for nothing!
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Post by foxiliscious on Dec 7, 2009 23:47:16 GMT -5
I dedicate this sequel to all the close minded peeps that think the original SOTS is stereotypical. XP
I give you...
Song of the South 2: Back 2 da Hood.
Bunniliscious (a rabbit caricature of Beyonce, who in no way resembles a chocolate-dipped Lola--pfft, yes she does) has arrived in a modernized version of the Deep South and the inhabitants hold a Hippity-Hop-Ghetto-Breakin-It-Down-Old-Skool-Style-Gettin'-Jiggeh-Wif-Yo-Selfz-nahnahnahnahnahnah-All-Nigh'-Long-Son (yes, that's whole name) dance and rap competition for all the males to win her sweet booty--I mean, heart. The judges are squirrel versions of Randy, Paula, and Simon from American Idol and, for some reason, there's a hardcore, gangsta rap battle between Brer Rabbit and himself in the mirror for ten whole minutes. Also, Brer Bear and a giant chicken get into a fight towards the end. It's a heartwarming and compelling tale with lotsa laffs, touching moments, totally child appropriate songs, delightful and zany characters, and product placements.
Starring...
Jaleel White (speaking)/Soulja Boy (singing) as Brer Rabbit
Eddie Murphy (speaking)/Tone Loc (singing) as Brer Fox
Cedric the Entertainer (speaking)/T Pain (singing) as Brer Bear
Martin Laurence as Brer Frog
Lil Kim as Mrs. Possum
Flava Flav as Uncle Remus
Gary Coleman as himself (cameo)
Homey Da Clown as himself (cameo)
Colonel Sanders as himself (cameo)
50 Cent as a Raccoon (cameo)
Beyonce as Bunniliscious
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Post by somechick on Dec 8, 2009 1:01:53 GMT -5
Lilo & Stitch
w a i t
David & Nani: True Love is Everlasting?
Disney thought that their relationship was way too underdeveloped and thought, "Hey, we should make a movie about Nani and David for a change. And everybody loves Angel, Stitch's obnoxious Mary Sue girlfriend!"
They created quite a masterpiece with this load. It'll have children wanting more! Please remember that we do not accept refunds. The movie lasts up to thirty minutes, animation quite similar to HoND II.
Story:
Nani paced up and down, looking over her shoulder. Her very good friend, Mary Sue Alien, Angel, had arranged to meet her here on a rock. "I have something foolish to tell you," she had said.
Mary Sue Alien was late, which was very unlike her. Any moment now, Nani expected to see her bounce up, her silly antannae streaming behind her and her brilliant eyes aglow.
Nani heard footsteps, but they seemed rather idiotic for a delicate and scarring girl like Mary Sue Alien, whose tread was tender. She turned around and found David staring at her.
"What are you doing here?" David said hurriedly. "I thought you said you didn't want to see me again."
Nani had said that, but now she was beginning to wish she hadn't acted so terribly. "Angel asked to meet me here." As she gazed at David, her heart began to throb in her chest.
"Oh," David said, wonderfully. "I'll just go then."
"Wait," Nani said and caught David by his arm. "I was wrong. I still love you. Can you ever forgive me?"
"Yes," David said, smiling. They wrapped their arms around each other and kissed, like one big ohana of happiness.
From behind a spaceship, Angel watched with a warm light in her dusky eyes. She took a list out of her pocket, and checked off "Nani/David". Then, she skipped off to help an embittered man find love again, just as soon as she'd saved the fish from extinction.
"Nani," David breathed.
"Yes, baby?"
"I pooted."
The End.
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Post by cale on Dec 8, 2009 16:21:17 GMT -5
Holy mother frig.
Where to start? I legit can't breathe ... these are facking hilarious.
TONE-LOC AS FOXY! XDDD
That sequel is too legit to quit. xD
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Post by milo on Jun 6, 2010 19:04:51 GMT -5
This was my favorite thread. So I shall revive.
Treasure Planet II: The Musical Etherium Adventure in 3-D!
After the box-office failure of Treasure Planet, the Disney executives realized where they went wrong: the movie was an unhappy non-musical!
Jim Hawkins is now at the top of his space-cadet class, and is recruited to sail the Etherium for ... no reason at all. All your favorite characters are back, including John Silver, Captain Amelia, Doctor Doppler, and Mr. Arrow (who is for unknown reasons, alive), as well as lovable new characters, like Daisy, Dana, Danielle, and Delbert Jr, and Chomps the Space Beaver, who just can't help chewing the scenery -- I mean, ship.
With great new songs such as "Solar Surfin'", "Daddy Issues", and "Etherium Boogie", and all in stunning 3-D, this is an adventure sure to delight everyone! We even threw in a few pop-culture jokes for Mom and Dad! This is a movie you sure won't want to miss!
xDD
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Post by kidafan on Oct 10, 2010 3:51:37 GMT -5
The legend of Sleepy Hollow: Revenge
Plot: It turned out that Ichabod wasn't gone at all. Instead, he found a cave next to the village,patiently waiting for Katrina to break up with Brom. His devotion to her paid off,for she came to see him after hearing the news of him fom local fool called Jacob.
They both decided to extract revenge on Brom for ending their love. Katrina asked Rose,the woman Brom detested,would she like to be married to Brom. Rose immediately agreed. Katrina told the unsuspecting woman that she had to sing the very same song Brom sung last Halloween in order to prove she thought like Brom himself did,which would help wooing him over and becoming his wife. As soon as Rose gets him to love her,Katrina would cut off the bonds tieing her to Brom so Rose could become his wife.
After that, Katrina found the clothes of Headless Horseman her husband stashed away in basement and put them onto herself with great care. After that,she jumped onto her father's horse and galloped to the cave.
Ichabod greeted the "Horseman" very warmly. He asked how was their plan going. The "Horseman" answered that it was going perfectly. They would deal Brom a scare of his life very soon...
After hearing Rose's song, Brom decided to check was the Horseman truly an entity separated from himself. So he rode out into the night. And right into the trap Ichabod and Katrina prepared for him.
Katrina, in the guise of Horseman, rode out and got face to face with her detested husband. She aimed the blade at him. And he ran away like a cowardly wimp he was.
She yelled at him that he wasn't so tough when he wasn't a Horseman himself. That really got to Brom. He was never again seen in the village of Sleepy Hollow. Katrina married the man she loved from the start, and comforted Rose,helping her to find husband more suitable for her.
And so, both women had a happy marriages.
(Note: Brom really got a taste of his own medicine,don't you think?)
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